Warfare

flu

When I began my DMin program, I severely underestimated the level of warfare that would hit our home as a result of my obedience to God. These last three years since I started at Duke have been filled with awesome experiences as well as trying circumstances. This week I've made more progress in moving in the direction of producing a written document than I have in the past year. Last week I made the decision to completely devote the month of February to my writing, to exclusion of everything else. I am only what could be hours away from the completion of a solid first chapter and I have a pretty good road map of where I'm headed in my writing, but the enemy takes no breaks and he won't seem to let me have one either. Yesterday Husband and I had a good day, the first one in many days, but before the sun could set he came down with the flu. His condition deteriorated rapidly and for the first time in a very long time, he was really sick. This morning I convinced him to seek medical attention only to learn that my insurance had been cancelled because of an $8.42 oversight on my part. You've got to be freakin kidding!!! After hours on the phone with the Maryland Benefits Health Exchange and the insurance carrier to no avail, I decided to drag Husband to the minute clinic at CVS. He immediately tested positive for the flu on top of which we were told that I would have to start medication as well because I'm probably already sick, but just don't know it. Wait...what...huh??? That means $400 in medication and the minute clinic visit and revenue lost because Husband cannot work tomorrow.

This has the hand of the enemy written all over it. Just when I was all cried out I realized tomorrow is Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent. I'd already made the commitment to fasting during Lent because we desperately need God to move in our lives like never before. Then I remembered that the weapons of my warfare are not carnal; that it is time to stretch out on faith and weaponize my spiritual practices. Fasting, praying, speaking the word, and anointing spaces don't feel like much when you are running out of money, energy, time, and patience, but leaning on your spiritual practices is about the most powerful thing you can do. I started by praying, then I turn my social media into a spiritual weapon by asking my friends to pray. That's why it pays to have the right friends on your timeline. Not only did my friends pray, but two of them messaged me about helping me to get medication and resolving my insurance problem. In the midst of it all, God still is!

There was one other thing that sat in my spirit as I looked at Husband, weak and fatigued. Husband's stepfather has faced numerous health challenges, so much so that we call him the million dollar man because it was only by God's grace that he's here. Now there is a new health challenge rearing its ugly head. Also yesterday I learned that someone who was once a close friend and brother passed away yesterday. He has a wife and six children. I've been so worried about Husband these past 24 hours because I'm not used to seeing him like this, but I can't imagine what my mother in law has felt all these years fighting battle after battle or what life has been for my friend's wife watching her husband succumb to cancer. Let's not forget that there are financial implications in each of these situations. My crisis today is small stuff comparatively speaking, but it fills me with compassion for these and all wives who have walked with their husbands through sickness.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. ~2 Corinthians 1:3-4