Love & Honor

Just a few days ago I was driving in my car thinking that I probably could be more intentional about showing my husband that I appreciate him. Busy, ambitious, hopeful, stressed out, and worried are just a few of the words that describe the both of us on any given day. It's no wonder that I sometimes feel like we get lost in all of that madness and I generally don't take the time to explicitly say, "I appreciate you." After a decade of marriage I'm pretty sure he knows I love him, but sometimes concern for the business, the bills, and even the dog can choke the life out the daily affection exchanged between couples.

Then almost as if in a moment of perfect serendipity (or synchronicity), a friend sent me the link to a website called I Will Honor My Husband. This website was created by a wife named Rochelle who is on a one-year mission to honor her husband each and every single day for the entire year. Her blog follows her journey, shares thoughtful ways to honor your husband, and invites others to join the movement and share their experiences. Initially reading the words 'I Will Honor My Husband' made the raging feminist within me bristle a just a tad, but then after all isn't that exactly what I had been looking to do? Of course the self-centered part of me wanted to pull out a scale and measure pound for pound exactly how much 'honor' I am receiving before I join the movement, that is until God convicted me. Then I thought about the fact that I'm always wanting to give my husband things that I can't right now- a week-long vacation in a warm weather climate, a new car, a larger flat screen for our family room. (In actuality these are really things that I want, all except the flat screen.) But God said, "why would I enable you to give him those things when you don't give the things that you can?"

As young women we hear repeated messages about learning to value ourselves and rightfully so. Most of us are so foolish about relationships as young women that we do not put ourselves first or demand that anyone else does. Then years later we become educated, self-sufficient, upwardly mobile, independent women and that's fine too (unless of course you are also mean and bitter). But what I'm finding is that there aren't enough messages in preparation for marriage to bring balance to our 'self-love' influences once we enter meaningful relationships and are headed toward marriage. My hope is that Rochelle's journey really becomes a movement and that we as women learn that it takes nothing away from us to love... and yes honor... our husbands.